Why Setting Goals Is Good for Your Family

by RuthAnn Zimmerman

Over the years, I have come to realize that when people express overwhelm or bafflement at the thought of a family our size, a primary reason is because they’re envisioning their own grocery bills, gym memberships, and wardrobe costs multiplied by the number of children they see around my shopping cart. They are imagining the occasional chaos of mealtimes and bedtimes and the battles of wills they face when it is homework time. Because they cannot fit the size of our family into the only lifestyle, budget, routines, and goals they are familiar with, they conclude that it can’t be done—or it can’t possibly be done joyfully, successfully, and with healthy results for all.

But the truth is, there are meaningful, doable ways through all seasons of parenting. Whether you have one child or ten, you can grow a homestead family of healthy, whole children—and adults, let’s not forget ourselves—by setting long-term goals that guide your choices and echo your principles and priorities.

First, we set the goals. While you may have other categories, the core ones we focus on are:

• Strength of spirit

• Strength of body

• Strength of mind

• Strength of character

• Strength of family

The most effective long-term goals are simple. When we, as parents, are holding up every decision against the goal, we want it to be straightforward so no matter the ages of our children or the stage of family life we’re in, we know when a choice or priority measures up.

The best goals allow for different personalities, interests, and gifts to flourish and for God to work individually in the life of each child, giving plenty of room for each member of the family to make mistakes, recognize those mistakes and misjudgments, and correct their actions. 

A simple family goal kept in the forefront of your mind, for each life category, will be like a single beacon of light, helping you make confident decisions as you go about your day. For example, if our goal is for our children to flourish in faith and be spiritually strong, then we teach them to pray and have a love for God’s Word, and we make sure to set an example of spiritual priorities, such as family devotions, church, and youth group activities.

If our goal is strength of body, then we focus on providing the kind of nutritional support and opportunities for exercise that help us stay out of the doctor’s office as much as possible.

If our goal is for our children to have an insatiable curiosity that spurs a lifelong joy of discovery and learning, then we make sure to protect their free play and create an environment of training, learning, and encouragement.

If our goal is to instill character, then we must fashion our days in a way that leaves time to work together on correcting mistakes and makes room for do-overs rather than simply rushing through to check things off a list.

If our goal is to foster strong family connections and relationships, then we may limit what children are involved in beyond the home so there aren’t too many missed opportunities to work, dine, and play together as a family.

Simply put, we adjust our lifestyle to fit our long-term goals.

Try this simple recipe from RuthAnn’s new book, The Heart of the Homestead, for your next family night:

CARAMEL POPCORN

Yields 1 gallon

INGREDIENTS

6 quarts popped corn, lightly salted

1 cup butter

2 cups packed brown sugar

½ cup pure maple syrup

1 tsp. salt

2 T. vanilla

½ tsp. baking soda

DIRECTIONS

Pop popcorn and set aside. In medium saucepan over medium-low heat, melt butter, brown sugar, and maple syrup and then simmer for 5 minutes. Remove from heat, wait for simmering to stop, then add salt, vanilla, and baking soda. Mix thoroughly and pour over the popcorn. Stir gently to partially cover all popcorn.

Bake at 250° for 45 minutes, stirring every 15 minutes. Cool to room temp and store in airtight containers.

Caramel popcorn is shelf stable for a month or more and can be frozen for 6 or more months.

RuthAnn Zimmerman lives on a 22-acre homestead in northeast Iowa with her husband, Elvin, and their five children. RuthAnn and Elvin also have two adult daughters, two sons-in-law, and one grandson. Ruth’s writing has appeared in several print and online publications, including Homesteaders of America, Homestead Mamas, and The Homegrown Sourcebook. On her popular website, she shares about homesteading, parenting, and cooking.